


Justified (Perceptions 'verse ficlet)

by sparrow2000



Series: Perceptions 'verse [5]
Category: BtVS - Fandom
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-03
Updated: 2011-04-03
Packaged: 2017-10-17 13:33:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/177356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sparrow2000/pseuds/sparrow2000
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Xander thinks and watches Spike</p>
            </blockquote>





	Justified (Perceptions 'verse ficlet)

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Joss and Mutant Enemy et al own everthing. I own nothing and make no profit from this story.

_**Ficlet: Justified (Perceptions 'verse)**_  
Beta extraordinaire: [](http://thismaz.livejournal.com/profile)[**thismaz**](http://thismaz.livejournal.com/)

I’m standing by the window looking out at the twilight views of the bay below. Ironic that after all Spike’s bitching and unspoken fear about me sightseeing, and potential suicide attempts on the Golden Gate Bridge, now that we are actually here in San Francisco – calling it home, calling it the haven I didn’t know I was searching for - we’ve settled here, in sight of the bridge, in sight of the bay. It calls to me and I know that it calls to Spike, and if I reach out into the gathering dark I almost feel that I could touch the memories from the past and the desires of a future yet to be written.

So I’m here, watching the lights, watching them play and flicker and gleam on the water, tracing the way the shadows ebb and flow through the ferry terminals and the genteel development that doesn’t believe in the things that go bump in the night. I guess it’s that incongruity that pulls me back, making me look at things through different eyes. I remember Spike dragging me to a French movie once, there were no subtitles and he didn’t explain, but I just stared at the screen and sank into the story and watched the expressions and the body language and the sex. Then everyone died and there was ‘Fin’. It makes me wonder if that’s how everyone else saw us. Is that how Willow sees us, as some incomprehensible movie, just ending and destruction and bewildering finality?

I smile as the next song starts on the old boom box that almost seems like a third person in this strange relationship of ours. I love the mix tapes where you never know what’s coming next. I learned to dance listening to the music from this old machine. I learned to fight and I learned how to love. Every song is unexpected and every emotion they evoke feels like it is newly formed just for me. Just for Spike. And I shake my head at my own fancy and wonder if Spike’s love for poetry is finally rubbing off on me.

 _Everybody laughed when I told them_  
I wanted you, I wanted you  
Everybody grinned they humoured me  
They thought that someone had spiked my tea

The night breeze makes the half-pulled blind ripple and shake, and I tug the cord gently, lowering it to shut out the night and the view. The song winds on and as I turn away from the window, it’s the view on the other side of the room that hypnotises me. I listen to the lyrics, paying attention as I watch him, skin like alabaster, like snow on mountain peaks. Candles scattered on the mantle and small tables and the tile on the floor, they flicker and dance, and I watch him and the song curls around me.

 _Everybody screamed they told me you_  
Would cost the moon, we'll be there soon  
Everybody laughed till they were blue  
They didn't believe my words were true

He’s painting his nails, concentrated on the sweep and glide of polish, dark as the blackest runs that any out of bounds skier might dream of. A part of me wants to cross the floor and curl up at his side, distract him from his task with fingers, lips and tongue, but this is just as intimate, watching him focus, long pale fingers splayed on the arm of the chair, watching the careful movements until ivory hands are dipped in jet.

_Everybody laughed but you_

The scent of the candles hangs in the air, so heavy I can almost taste vanilla and cinnamon and clove.

_Everybody laughed but you_

My tongue flicks out, tasting the damp air and he looks up and tilts his head in mute question. And then he smiles. White mountain peaks, black runs, that’s my Spike - seductive and dangerous, daring me to try. And I dare to try.

**Author's Note:**

>   
>  **A/N**  
>  Lyrics are from ‘Everybody Laughed But You’ from Ten Summoner’s Tales by Sting. They are used with the greatest respect to the writer. No infringement of copyright is intended and no money is being made. I just thought they fitted the story.
> 
> Point of trivia courtesy of Wiki. This track apparently didn't appear on the original US/Canada release of the album, but did on the UK, European and Japanese releases. I have grown as a person now that I have that little snippet of knowledge :)


End file.
